Memory Poem

The glare of white light reflecting off the lavender floor. Standing off to one side anxiously awaiting my cue. In the last few minutes before I walk on, everything becomes crystal clear, as if I were dissevered from the world. The faint smell of fresh paint combined with the perfume from my hairspray. The dialogue sounds different somehow, even though it had become perfunctory from hearing it over and over, every day for the last month. I’m not nervous. Auditions, memorizing countless lines, hundreds of hours of practice, costume fittings, hair styling have all lead up to this one moment. I reflect on the other members of the play. Everyone is resplendent in their new costumes. The joy, fear, tears, and fights we have had don’t matter any more. I’m not nervous. Soon I will begin cavorting across the stage in the chimerical show. My mind flicks through my lines, making sure I am prepared, I know I am. The melee is always so much fun! My entrance is getting close. Soon the spoony antics will begin. I am reminded of how much I love this. The adrenaline, the buzzing nerves with the slightest twinge of fear is intoxicating. My chest gets tight with excitement. The audience is good tonight. Opening night is my favorite, the rush is the best. It crosses my mind how I wish the rush could last longer. Five lines away. Final adjustments to my costume, pull the skirt down, smooth my hair. Take a deep breath, excitement permeating ever fiber of my body. Two lines away now. My cue line. I walk onstage and begin my monologue. All of a sudden the nerves hit. NOW I’m nervous. But it is exhilarating.



Dissevered- (v) to separate, to sever
Permeate (v) to pass into or through ever part
Cavorting (v) to bound or prance in a sprightly manner, cavort
Exhilarating (v) to enliven; invigorate; stimulate
Intoxicating (adj) exhilarating, exciting
Resplendent (adj) shining brilliantly; gleaming; splendid
Chimerical (adj)wildly fanciful; highly unrealistic
Spoony (adj) foolish; silly
Melee (n) confusion; turmoil; jumble
Perfunctory (adj) performed merely as a routine duty; hasty and superficial

Evanescence Music Review

Everybody's Fool

perfect by nature
icons of self indulgence
just what we all need
more lies about a world that

never was and never will be
have you no shame don't you see me
you know you've got everybody fooled

look here she comes now
bow down and stare in wonder
oh how we love you
no flaws when you're pretending
but now i know she

never was and never will be
you don't know how you've betrayed me
and somehow you've got everybody fooled

without the mask where will you hide
can't find yourself lost in your lie

i know the truth now
i know who you are
and i don't love you anymore

it never was and never will be
you don't know how you've betrayed me
and somehow you've got everybody fooled

it never was and never will be
you're not real and you can't save me
somehow now you're everybody's fool


The band Evanescence is composed of main vocalist/pianist Amy Lee, Terry Balsamo on guitar and Tim McCork on bass guitar. This multiple Grammy winning band was formed in Little Rock, Arkansas and quickly rose to fame across both the United States and Europe, going multi platinum and staying a year on Billboard's Top 50 with their album "Fallen". Although the band has had several changes in members, Amy Lee (the only original member)has stayed true to her original intentions and style.
The subject matter for this band is often very dark and extremely emotional, creating a cathartic feeling in some songs, ranging from heartbreak to death to fantastic images. The song "Everybody's Fool" is a good example of both the sound and subject of this band. The video has a sarcastic and satirical sense about everything that seems perfect and mainstream, saying that "nothing is as good as a lie" and showing that someone who seems so happy and perfect actually could be extremely tormented. This shows how the band is trying to go against norms and stereotypes of society. The sound is an interesting mix of rich piano and loud guitar riffs and drums with Lee's haunting and powerful voice.
This band's style is contested and everyone seems to have a different opinion. While it is often defined as "Metal" many die hard metal fans call it too "watered down" or "commercial" to be true metal. Others, including Rolling Stone call it "Gothic rock" yet some other bands deny that Evanescence is gothic rock. There is even some controversy involving their inclusion in the Christian music boards, although Amy Lee denies ever trying to be that genre. It almost seems like Evanescence is a band that does not belong to one genre. In an interview, Lee says that they intentionally cross boundaries but seem to have "gothic electronica" sounds. Still others classify it as nu metal, symphonic metal, or pop goth. The intense lyrics lend the gothic feel, especially songs like "Tourniquet" or "Haunted" which deal with suicide and dark imagery. The metal comes through the guitar and drums. While some may argue that they are too mainstream, Evanescence still has a metal background with gothic undertones.
Amy Lee and the other original member, Ben Moody, both wrote and performed the songs and shared equal credit for their work. Amy Lee is classically trained in piano, and she says she has been influenced by Mozart as well as other rock or metal bands like Nine Inch Nails, Sarah McLachlan,Sting, Enigma, Michael Jackson, Portishead, Plumb, Toni Amos, and Danny Elfman, the genius behind The Nightmare Before Christmas. All of these could influence different aspects, from sound to lyrics. Amy Lee managed to combine all these aspects into something unique. It may sound strange to combine classical piano with metal, but I think it creates an intriguing sound with songs on albums reaching from haunting ballads to gothic rock. As to who this band could have influenced, any metal or rock band could have picked up on certain aspects of Evanescence that they liked. Avec, Ethereal, Jael, Last Minute, Opaque, and Ruby Bullet all have sounds similar to Evanescence and even have similar aesthetics.
The songs from this band all seem to have a different message, from moving on after heartbreak to wanting to give up. The song "Everybody's Fool" has an especially potent message. It speaks clearly to everyone who believes that perfection looks a certain way. In the video, Lee portrays a seemingly successful and happy person who is really in inner turmoil and hates her life. She has betrayed herself and hates who she has become. This message of going against society is very fitting for the band who does not necessarily appeal to everyone, and they are fine with that. The line "I don't love you anymore" is directed towards Lee herself in the video, an especially evocative phrase that portrays the anguish and turmoil. Major themes in their songs include love, pain, and daring to be different.
Co- founder Ben Moody once stated that the message of the band is that "God is love". Since God never once crossed my mind by listening to this music, I would be willing to bet that they did not acheive this message completely, although it was popular in Christian music for a while. Amy Lee recently said that she does not consider this a Christian band and that she was tired of being asked about it. Contradictorily, one member said that they wanted to express that "Christianity is not a rigid list of rules to follow". This one makes a bit more sense, although religion is not clearly spoken of in any of the songs. Music like this is often open to interpretation, and whatever the listener feels from the music. The band members have said that they are tired of neat categories, people should think for themselves about this music. Therefore, they acheive their goal of making people think about the music they are listening to. In a way, not having a particular message is their message, for people to decide for themselves instead of following blindly.
By challenging the world to actually think for themselves for once, this band could create some danger. Any time people think outside the box there is a possibility for danger to the accepted system. While the group is not encouraging people to violently take things into their own hands, they do want independence and individuality, unlike the girl in "Everybody's Fool" who followed and found things to be not as she wanted.
Evanescense has one of the most powerful voices in music right now with Amy Lee and combines it with instruments for a phenomenal sound. Even if you do not think that this band is appealing, at least give it a chance because the deeply personal songs can speak to everyone and decide for yourself what the songs mean.

Hypnopaedia.

Imagination is power is a statement that goes compeltely against everything in Brave New World, where anything creative or free thinking is quickly suppressed. This video uses images of brightly colored and moving images to grab attention and help inspire a person's creativity. The pictures can seem strange but with the power of a mind, anything is possible. The music is "Imaginary" by Evanescence and it talks about letting imagination take you to amzing places and away from any unhappy moments in your life. Imagination can let skies be purple, animals can fly, and clouds can be made of candy. The Hypnopaedia comes through the combination of music and images that could almost hypnotize a person into wanting and thirsting for new images and creativeness.

Dramatic Monologue (BNW)

A man can die but once, unfortunately.
Growing up on the reservation taught me that
I was not the same as everyone else.
I proved my dedication time and time again
yet they would not let me perform the ritual.
I was more worthy than anyone else.
As I beat myself, purged myself, I hoped they would see.
They never did.
My mother was shameful and everyone looked down on us.

My mother was little more than kin, and less than kind.
She kept talking about Other Place, how it was different,
that it was normal to have more than one partner.
Where they had clean things, never needed washing or mending,
medicine for everything.
She taught me how to read and write and gave me Shakespeare.
Then she found mescal and was soon reduced to nothing.
Even less than nothing.
Embarrassing.

Now is the winter of our discontent.
The strangers came and I got my opportunity to leave the reservation.
Apparently Other Place is real.
When I got there I realized the differences.
Linda was out into an institution where she was given soma.
She stayed in a stupor until she died.

That beautiful girl Lenina made me feel
more than I've felt for anyone before.
Yet she is a strumpet. How dare she?
She pressed herself upon me and i struck her.
I only wanted love. Love never did run smooth.

I found my own land and started my purge.
The flow of blood down my back was ecstacy.
Whipping and beating was proof of my feelings.
Getting rid of the filth and contamination of society.
Finally left to peace, but not for long.
They found me and flocked in great numbers.
They shouted at me. I whipped until the blood ran free.
In the morning i woke up and realized what had happened.
I hung myself. Dead, forever and a day.

The Moon-Drenched Forest (found poem)

The winter sun shines through the leaves
To throw dappled shade upon the ground.
Gentle birdsong floats through the air.
Clouds appear and the wind utters a sigh of sadness.
The soft rain hissing on the magnolia leaves
Drips onto the blossoms floating in the clear pools.
The murmuring mountain brooks
Dance among the light-flecked banks.
When night falls the Luna moth
Emerges into the moon-drenched night
And shivers like autumn leaves.
An owlish silhouette whispers through the trees,
Leaving shadows on the lacey ground.

When morning returns the forest will awake from the muddy sleep,
Stirring and waking to great the new day.
A mountain lion will utter a silvery soprano scream,
The sleepy owl a mournful hoot.
But for now, the forest will sleep amid the pristine silver of the moon.

Long Day's Journey Into Night

Long Day’s Journey Into Night

The characters in any story or play are affected by many outside stimuli. In O’Neill’s Long Day’s Journey Into Night, the setting, plot, and theme all affect the characters in both positive and negative ways. Everything in this play has a symbolic meaning, from the fog around the house to things the characters themselves say or do. The author must first paint a picture of where and when the story takes place for the reader to better imagine what is happening in the story. The plot is necessary to move the characters along in their lives. Themes are important to connect the storylines with other works or everyday lives. All of these aspects come together to form the complete story with nuances and details.


Setting is very important to this work. The time period has a lot to do with how the characters are treated and interact. The play takes place during times when tuberculosis was a big problem. Edmund catches consumption and must be sent to a sanitarium, something that causes a lot of problems for the family. The physical setting of the summer house speaks volumes of the mindsets of the family. The house is only inhabited a few months out of the year, it’s a temporary place of residence, not a home, which is what the characters really need. Obviously the characters sense a lack of structure in their lives that they reflect in different ways. The house is constantly flooded with fog, making Mary nervous, while symbolizing how the family fog their emotions and refuse to see the truth in front of their faces. Mary has problems with the fog horn constantly sounding, showing her mental breakdown of worry over her son and her relapse back into addiction to morphine. The sea is nearby, symbolizing the changeable and cold nature of the family, aimless and without direction. Tyrone always keeps the lights off in the house, showing both his hatred of spending money and how the family keeps their feelings in the dark. Of course, the entire play takes place in just one day, going back to the Greek belief that a tragedy should all come to fruition in one day. Setting in this play tells information about both the characters and the place.


The plot of this play has a lot to say about the characters themselves and is the vehicle to get them from beginning to end. Over the course of the day, the plot allows the reader to see how the family interacts with each other, and Mary’s slip into a mental breakdown. Jamie and Edmund show the dependence on alcohol in the entire family while Mary talks to Cathleen and gives the information of her broken past and her unhappiness in the presence. Tyrone demonstrates his lack of dedication in his life, as shown in his settling on one job while moving around constantly. At the end of the play Mary gets her wedding dress out in order to symbolize her fragile mental state.


Regret is one of the major themes of this work. Regret tells so much about the people in the work. Each of them, especially Mary have problems in the past. She says that she had a bright future, either a concert pianist or a nun. Unfortunately she fell for Tyrone and had to follow him all over the country. When she lost her second child she never really got over it, especially since she thinks she tried to replace him by having Edmund. Her regret about how she ended up in the house by the sea seeps into the rest of the family. Jamie has no real ambition or drive, simply looking for meaning by visiting Fat Violet. Edmund sometime wishes for death, like when he says he should have been born a seagull. The regret affects the characters by perpetuating the sadness and circumstances of the family.


All of these aspects contribute to who the characters are. They are changed because of the setting, plot, and the way they deal with regret. If they had different reactions, they may have been a more functional or healthy family, able to cope with difficulties. Unfortunately it takes tragedy to shock them into noticing Mary’s health and everyone else’s need for alcohol. Peter Quinn writes about the affect of Catholicism has on Tyrone. A devout Catholic would do what is best for his family, instead of turning a blind eye. Instead of getting Mary the help she needs, he simply got her hooked on morphine, which does not help anything. The intricate web of the past and present causes the family sadness and unhappiness because of the choices they made.






Work Cited:
Quinn, Peter. "Down the Nights and Down the Days: Eugene O'Neill's Catholic Sensibility." Commonweal 124.n18 (Oct 24, 1997): 22(2). Academic OneFile. Gale. Lee County Library System. 21 Sept. 2008 .

College Essay

Growing up in Florida has made me no stranger to widespread power outages during hurricane season. I am all too familiar with the darkness following the storm. Yet nothing had ever prepared me for what happened one night as I walked down a strange street in a foreign country.
In March of my Junior year in high school, my Spanish teacher took a group of students to the Galapagos Islands. The trip was incredible, but one of my most vivid memories occurred on the last night. Our group was walking down the main street in the small city when all of the lights flickered and went off. Apparently this happens all the time, because the residents did not panic, they merely lit candles and continued on as if all was normal. However, us tourists in the middle of the street clung to each other to stay together. A million thoughts ran through my mind, worrying about getting run over by a car or separating from the group. Amid panic, I gripped my friends’ hands even tighter. As my eyes adjusted to the pitch black, something made me look up to the sky and I saw…everything. I saw more stars than I had ever seen before, including the Milky Way. It was incredibly beautiful. The awe of seeing the night sky strewn with billions of stars took my breath away. It was a good thing my friends and I had grabbed hands, because I was too busy gaping at the sky to watch where I was going. Without my friends I would have walked into a building, into a parked car, off the pier…
Thanks to my friends, I did not fall off the pier, I was able to soak in the sight of the universe and learn a few things. Whether the electricity failing was a human error, a faulty generator, or chance, I am grateful it happened because it taught me a few things. I was reminded that even in the darkest periods of life, my friends will always guide me and prevent me from falling. Ever since that night I have avoided taking my friends for granted. I also learned that when you least expect it, Nature will knock you sideways and remind you that it’s still in control. I have not forgotten the feeling of how incredibly large the world is and how tiny we are, like tiny pinpricks of light in the vast night sky. Something so familiar as darkness has so much impact in the right situation. Sometimes the lack of illumination provides the most illumination of all.

Like Thoughts

Like dragonflies flitting through the blue sky,
Like steam rising from a cup of hot coffee,
Like the dust the wind flings to the heavens,
Like the mist that rises off the road after a heavy rain,
Like an exhaled breath on a very cold day,
Thoughts are here one moment and gone the next.
Able to be seen but never for long.
Blink and you miss them.
The fleeting, fickle nature of thinking
Causes both confusion and clarity.
Allowing minds to wander can result in beauty.
Different worlds, people, places can be explored.
An escape from reality is needed.
Like a firefly flickering in the night,
Thoughts are here and gone.